I’m back! (copy of journal entry)

Well I’m back! I just got over a month long’s block of major resistance.

I was in a situation where my future plans for the summer and the following
fall were hanging in the balance for quite some time, and I couldn’t
progress–I couldn’t focus–I couldn’t do anything. I had intense intestinal
distress from the stress of the situation, but some major resistance was
preventing me from even attempting qigong. I felt physically, mentally,
emotionally, and spiritually distracted and any attempt of dealing with
the blockage was met with an equal and opposite counterforce.

I was caught in some indetermined state where certain things were in motion,
and I could literally do nothing at all but just wait for the outcome. It
was very very frustrating. The only thing I could manage to do was
to try to tune my inner heart to the Tao so I could hopefully meet
whatever was coming my way with unconditional acceptance.

Then, finally, like pressure having built up behind a clogged pipe came
the long awaited release.

The fantastic thing is that despite having a month of nothing but bad
signs about things to come, finally when the outcome came, it ended up
being the OPPOSITE. My situation for the summer, fall, next year, and
time thereafter are poised in a way that really couldn’t be better.
In a complete reversal of the bad direction things were going, my
situation is becoming quite better than it ever was before.

In fact, my summer has opened up in a way that has made it
possible for me to go a summer retreat or two (which I didn’t
think would have been possible before, even under the best of
situations).

On Monday, I plan on trying to call the Retreat phone number and
see if either the Mantak Chia retreat or Michael’s QF1-4 retreats
are still available. If one of them is still available, I’m
going to go on a retreat this summer (in fact, if both are still
available, I’m going to see about going to both)

It may be overcast outside today, but I’m BEAMING inside.

Yang inner smiles to you all,
Steven