Spiritual Transformative Experiences: Common Challenges (Research)

COMMON CHALLENGES FOLLOWING A SPIRITUALLY TRANSFORMATIVE EXPERIENCE
ACISTE
Last Updated March 4, 2010

http://www.aciste.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=58&Itemid
=61

Note: There is very little research that addresses common needs and
challenges following a spiritually transformative experience. To our
knowledge, no formal research based determination of need in this important
area has ever been conducted. As ACISTE gathers more research data, this
site will be revised and updated. The following represents a summary of what
is known to date. It relies heavily on smaller studies of one category of
spiritually transformative experiences — the near-death experience.

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As part of the integration process that leads to positive changes and
transformations following a spiritually transformative experience, an
experiencer may also have to deal with one or more challenges. Not every
person who has had a spiritually transformative experience deals with
difficult challenges, nor to the same degree.The intensity, scope, or
absence of the challenges depend on many factors, including the age or
health of the experiencer, their cultural background beliefs and attitudes
prior to the experience, the content of the experience and/or how the
experience was accepted by one’s significant relationships,including
spouses, parents, friends, colleagues, doctors, clergy, therapists, etc.

The following is a list and description of possible challenges faced by
people who have had one or more spiritually transformative experiences. The
challenges may overlap and they may not occur in the sequence provided.

Common challenges include:

• Processing a radical shift in reality

• Accepting the return and “homesickness”

• Issues related to sharing the experience

• Integrating new spiritual values with earthly expectations

• Problems dealing with psychic abilities

• Increased sensitivity to electricity, chemicals, smells, sounds, etc.

• A yearning to find and live one’s purpose

Depending on the severity of these challenges and other life factors, an
experiencer may have difficulty with isolation, depression, anxiety,
divorce, substance abuse or financial distress.

Processing a radical shift in reality

A spiritually transformative experience can be a dramatic and complete
immersion into a reality unlike anything experienced in one’s life
previously. As a result of this experience, experiencers may undergo a
permanent and complete paradigm shift in their views of their roles in life,
reality and what happens when they die. It can be a sudden diversion from
one’s accustomed perspective on life and catalyst for profound change.
Childhood experiencers may not describe or remember their lives prior to
their experiences, but are impacted by feeling different from children who
have not had these experiences.

Unlike dreams or hallucinations, STErs often describe their experiences as
either equally real or more real than reality itself. To re-enter one’s body
or reality after this experience, with a new view of self and life’s
purpose, much time is needed to process the experience and all of its
implications. The adjustment or integration period can continue for years or
for the rest of one’s life. Henceforth, experiencers may struggle to
integrate or bring into balance the two differing subjective experiences of
reality — a physical and a non-physical realm, this life and an afterlife,
an earthly reality and a spiritual reality.

Accepting the return and “homesickness”

How easily an experiencer accepts being returned to his or her life depends
on many of the above-mentioned factors. While many experiencers may refer to
the reality of their experiences as “home,” not all experiences are filled
with love and light. Some may be extremely frightening.

In the case of uplifting experiences, many can develop a yearning to return
or become “homesick” which can be an ongoing challenge or one that is
intermittent. The yearning for “home” can be so strong that some may become
depressed or even consider suicide. They may not carry out their suicides,
for fear or guilt, or religious concerns. Others may feel ungrounded for
some time, or devote themselves to spiritual or meditative practices in the
attempt to recapture the love and peace felt in their experience.

In the case of near-death experiencers, a good percentage choose to return
to their bodies, for the sake of loved ones or other reasons, however many
more are not given a choice to return at all. Emotions regarding the return
can range from anger to giddiness at the thought of being able to serve
others. Other emotions are fear, disappointment, bitterness, unhappiness,
acceptance, rejection, gratitude, confusion, relief and humility.

Near-death experiencers, in particular, may still be dealing with the
physical pain, illness and/or emotional traumas that led up to the
experience in the first place, which can acerbate any feelings of
homesickness, sadness or anger over being sent back.

Issues related to sharing the experience

One of the most common challenges experiencers face are those related to
labeling, describing and sharing their experiences. At the same time,
research has indicated that in order to successfully integrate the meaning
and impact of these experiences, experiencers need to be able to share them
and discuss their meanings and consequences in supportive contexts. Yet,
most experiencers deal invalidating, uninformed, or otherwise harm-producing
responses or do not share them at all, for fear of invalidation. The need to
disclose or share the experience, especially immediately afterwards, may be
intense, especially with one’s loved ones. Their response can greatly
influence whether or when the experiencer chooses to share his or her
experience again. Perhaps the least shared experiences are those which may
invoke ridicule or judgment, including those who had suicidal near-death
experiences, ones associated with substance abuse or for those who had
terrifying or distressing experiences.

Dealing with invalidation

Another issue related to sharing the experience is coping with traumatic and
isolating effects of having shared this very intimate and personal
experience with doctors, family members or trusted friends who were
dismissive, misunderstanding, or otherwise negative. There is a valid
concern that one could be pathologized or diagnosed with a mental illness by
uninformed professional healthcare providers. Experiencers have reported
divorce, ex-communication from churches and being fired from jobs for issues
related to sharing the experience. As long as people commonly dismiss these
experiences as “dreams,” “tricks played by Satan” or hallucinations,
experiencers’ fears are well justified — hence the importance of
confidentiality within ACISTE.

There several kinds of invalidating responses, even from well-intentioned
persons. While a near-death experiencer may be seeking validation and
understanding, listeners may be more interested in the details surrounding
the manner of death. Others may be curious about the experience, but are
seeking confirmation in that experience for their own religious or spiritual
beliefs. Others may not believe in a person’s near-death experience because
the experiencer was not clinically dead or did not see a tunnel or other
expected feature. Others may expect an experiencer to behave more positively
or have certain attitudes or beliefs because of their experience. If their
expectations are not met, they may dismiss the experience or reject the
experiencer.

Ineffability

Even in a supportive context, experiencers struggle to express what happened
to them because there is no earthly comparison or existing vocabulary for
much of the content of the experience. Those can include new and palpable
feelings of love, peace, unity, timelessness or all-knowing. There may be
perceptions, colors and sounds never felt, seen or heard before. The
inability to convey the totality of the experience leaves many feeling that
other people can never truly share, comprehend or believe them.

As a result of the difficulties related to sharing many have kept their
experiences to themselves for decades, often with stressful consequences.
Some have never shared their experiences even with family members.
Experiencers often report feelings of alienation, isolation or depression.

Integrating new spiritual values with earthly expectations

The values, message and meaning of the experience are often completely
inconsistent with one’s life prior to the experience, but the experiencer is
compelled to align that inconsistent life with his or her new paradigm.
Perhaps the most common message in these experiences is the importance of
unconditional love and how we treat each other on earth. Experiencers are
frequently given implicit instructions, guidance warnings, lessons,
prophecies, knowledge or messages. They report feeling challenged, urged or
compelled to live up to these upon their return becoming more compassionate,
forgiving tolerant loving or empathetic.

These new outlooks, directions and changes can bring friction in almost all
important areas of an experiencer’s life. The experience affects
relationships with others, careers, money, religion, spirituality, etc.
Divorce and career changes bring on stressful emotional and financial
upheaval, in addition to the other challenges an experiencer faces. In
studies of near-death experiencers, the divorce rate among adult
experiencers is higher than that of non-experiencers.

Changes in attitudes towards careers and money

Experiencers frequently report career changes due at least in part to their
experiences. Conflicting values and attitudes may be: “A position of power
no longer meant anything to me.” “I saw how my job was irrelevant.” “I
couldn’t handle how they treated people.” “They took earthbound things too
seriously.” “They saw me as weak.” “I could no longer tolerate the avarice
and greed.” “I had a heightened intuition about what was happening and
didn’t dare speak the truth.” “It wasn’t acceptable to talk about my
experience at work.” Experiencers may have difficulty in choosing new
careers or directions that are more closely aligned with his or her
spiritual values. To meet this challenge, experiencers often turn to careers
or volunteer work with charitable organizations or service-oriented
businesses.

Changes in religious views

Experiencers may no longer hold conventional views of “heaven,” “hell,”
“God,” “evil,” or “sin.” In one study, 78% of near-death experiencers said
their attitudes about their religious upbringing changed following their
NDEs. An experiencer’s new and often passionate views of spirituality and/or
religion, can evoke tension and even hostility among family members and
religious followers. A radical change in spiritual, religious views may
alienate the experiencer from previous relationships with family, friends
and one’s traditional religious community. Some may strengthen their
previously held religious views and become more involved with their
religious communities.

Changes in societal, political views

Views towards social issues of violence, prejudice, disease, poverty, or
justice often become very pronounced. An experiencer may become an activist
or intensely devoted to a cause that previously held little or no interest
to him or her. Changes in political or social views can bring additional
tensions to spouses, family members and friends who once shared similar
views.

Changes in attitudes toward death

As the vast majority of near-death experiencers lose their fear toward
death, they may express a joy or assurance in the afterlife for the dying or
the grieving. These helpful emotions can be difficult to suppress as they
see their loved ones suffer, in their view, perhaps needlessly. These views
can put them at odds with family members who may misinterpret an
experiencer’s confidence in the afterlife. Many experiencers become hospice
workers or spiritual counselors for the dying and the bereaved.

Changes in attitudes toward healing

While little research has been done in this area, it can be surmised from
changes in careers that experiencers change their attitudes in what causes
or heals disease. Many experiencers become healers using energy,
visualization, intuitive or other alternative approaches to standard medical
treatments. They themselves may be reluctant to seek out medical attention
for a number of reasons, including a lack of confidence in medical
procedures, heightened sensitivities to chemicals, an aversion to the system
itself, a belief in the power to heal themselves, or by alternative methods,
a belief that the health problem is the result of fate, punishment or
spiritual lesson, or they may have a yearning to return “home.” These
beliefs may frustrate family members or friends of the experiencer who rely
on standard medical procedures as their chief source of healing.

Problems dealing with psychic abilities

Of all spiritually transformative experiences, near-death events have been
the most studied, especially as it relates to aftereffects. Initial survey
results by ACISTE indicate that these same aftereffects apply, whether or
not an experiencer was close to death. As part of the change experiencers
undergo, they describe the challenge of adjusting to heightened
sensitivities and or psychic gifts, not all of which were welcomed. In one
study, 78% of near-death experiencers said that these heightened
sensitivities or gifts caused them problems.

In this same study, 100% of the respondents reported a heightened awareness
and sensitivity to strong emotions and negative behaviors. Typical comments
were: “I had to be alone with my senses a lot. This caused a problem with my
relationships.” “It’s hard for other people to understand why I am so
sensitive.” “Lying behavior is most troublesome.” “I feel other people’s
pain.” “I would pick up on people’s anxiety and get stomach problems.” “I
walk out of places that feel evil.”

83% reported being more acutely sensitive or aware of smells, visions,
tastes, sounds and/or touch. The majority reported a heightened awareness or
sensitivity to electricity, energetic fields, chi and/or auras.

In addition to these aftereffects, they may report one or more psychic
abilities. The abilities may include:

• intuitive, auditory or visual knowledge of what is or what is to come

• mediumship

• telepathy

• seeing auras

• ability to communicate with animals

• automatic writing

While many people may embrace or seek these abilities, that is not
necessarily the case with some experiencers. These abilities can surprise
and disrupt one’s customary thought processes and actions. Some may adjust
them into their lives or turn them into careers, accepting them as gifts,
while others described how they prayed to be “left alone.”

Increased sensitivity to electricity, chemicals, smells, sounds, etc.

Many experiencers report a heightened sensitivity to electricity, chemicals,
smells, loud noises, etc. They frequently describe difficulties readjusting
into previously “normal” environments, job settings, situations and events.
The sensitivity towards electricity or energetic fields can be so intense
that experiencers may feel they cannot work with computers, wear watches or
be around electrical devices. They may believe devices not only malfunction
in their presence, but feel uncomfortable around any event, device or person
who generates “negative energy.”

Some report new allergies or sensitivities to chemicals or smells. Many to
turn to organic foods, avoid perfume or scented or chemically treated
products.

A yearning to find and live one’s purpose

Experiencers may struggle not just with the fact that they were sent back,
but also with the reason for it. Some are told they have a purpose, but they
may not be told what it is. Many rely on some form of guidance or intuition
to make their decisions, but others struggle with finding a specific
purpose. Experiencers may agree that, in general, we are here to serve and
show unconditional love, but that may be a tall order – short on specifics
and difficult to apply.

Many believe that everything happens for a reason, although they may not
know what those reasons are. Some believe that we chose our lessons.
Comments may include: “It’s all homework.” “It’s not the experience, but how
we respond to it.” “We manifest our own disasters.” “To keep us on the
path.” “In order to appreciate life more, we must experience loss.” These
are beliefs that often run counter to traditional religious views.

Experiencers may have a very urgent need to live according to the message or
values learned in the experience. Some may fear returning without having
fulfilled their mission.

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ACISTE urges more research in this area. Please support our efforts by
donating or let us know of research being conducted to understand and meet
the needs of people who have had these experiences.

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