Fwd: Reclaiming Sexual Righteousness

A friend of mine sent this e-mail out today to a taoist men’s e-list. He gave his permission to have me post it here, thinking it might spark a useful discussion.

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In this final screechingly silent hour of Mercury retrograde, I turn inwards to contemplate the alchemy of male sexuality:

It was so painful to see how, our first minutes at heavenly mtn, two friends and I [employing a maximum of awkwardness] attempted to not be sexual with two women (some of us externally straining, some internally.) brilliant, sharp, creative, loving, deep and spiritual guys-angelic and perfect we are–and so deeply sexually crippled.

one of my friends, a serious practitioner of alchemy, is taking this head-on. so am I. we’re gonna put all our sexual essence in our cauldrons, period.

but that is merely the RETURN of the sexual life force to purity.
we also have to reprogram the chi and jing flow in the CREATION cycle too, right?
or else our newly purified (in the cauldron) sexual chi will just flow in the old patterns and dysfunctional pathways.

Sexual Skinning and Casting the Sexual Vessel one element at a time:

WATER
leaving behind my
conscious and unconscious
fear of sex and woman
and the earth

i enter into a sexual encounter/relationship/coupling
fundamentally guided by my body’s wisdom and inner knowing —
sexual union is the way of the universe,
the blessed union of yin and yang,
deeply natural

WOOD
having made peace with
unconscious sexual anger at women and
conscious sexual frustration at having my creative energy blocked
by affliction, cultural conditioning, and the competing interests of other shen

i enter into a sexual encounter/relationship/coupling with
generosity and kindness,
having so much creative energy to give,
unconditionally,
to a partner
completely and utterly forgiven.

FIRE
having digested or discarded
individual and collective,
karmic and acquired,
guilt, shame, and self-hatred
Inwardly directed or Outwardly Projected,

i enter into a sexual encounter/relationship/coupling

full of honor, respect, and love
given freely, and spontaneously, without compulsion, without fear.

EARTH
having cultivated a strong, true center. aware of strong, self-created boundaries. on solid ground, personally. trusting myself. without a need to give up my center to another or to a relationship or to have another give up their center to me or our relationship

i enter into a sexual encounter/relationship/coupling

with the intention to balance and harmonize two centers of perfection. to strengthen two individuals’ centers by creating a strong center between the two. no unbalanced compromises to any particularly afflicted or needy shen. balance and centering attained through the divine play of glorious sexual energies.

METAL

though i end with metal, it was in truth the beginning of my thoughts.
even in our attempts to renovate our corrupted sexuality
we can be biased towards the masculine.
we think we can compensate for our lack of sexual righteousness [yin]
by being that much more loving [yang,]
that much more respectful [yang,]
that much more generous [yang,]
as if maybe then, she’ll ignore the fact that sex is wrong,
that my sexuality is bad,
that i am taking her purity from her,
by tainting her pure white female sexuality
with my evil black male sexuality.

to be shameless is to have fire.
to be generous to have wood.

to know that a man’s sexuality is right.
his sexual desire righteous.
that is metal.

to see the male role in the sexual act
as embodying perfect spiritual integrity,

is to consolidate divine virtue in the sex act.
to be innocent.
to grasp the truth.

when two share jing, one cannot have righteousness if the other does not.

female sexuality is EXACTLY as corrupted as male sexuality,
because in the act of sex each adopts the other’s perception of taintedness, of incompletion.

i think metal may be the most important element in healing human sexuality.
because it is that righteousness that allows us to sink into the sexual act,
sink into the flowing energetic moment,
in coupling as in simple charged sexual conversation,
to be sexually present with your virtue.

if not, we are always fleeing the sexual moment,
escaping up into the intellectual moment,
to avoid facing our deepest grief, our sexual grief.

but in this we lose the opportunity to express our virtues sexually,
the most powerful way to express virtue,
we settle for the virtue of a kind heartbeat, or a kind thought.

to embody the truth, that male sexual desire is righteous, that’s a spiritual accomplishment.
to share that truth, sexually, is probably the most profound act of healing (and self-healing) that any of us will experience here on earth in bodies.

smiling golden sexual desire chi,

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