Is America a wasteland of Addicts & are most Earthlings not “Awake”- What does it mean?

You’re absolutely right, and I should learn to accept it!

It just makes me kind of sad inside.

It’s kind of like being a pot smoker with pot smoking buddies. Then you give it up, and become a happier person. Then spending time with your old pot smoking buddies just isn’t fun anymore, because you no longer get enjoyment out of smoking pot, so you’d rather be elsewhere. Furthermore, even though you realize that many of them could also be happier if they gave it up, they have no interest in doing so, and get angry at any suggestion.

It’s really an emotional issue on my part.

1. I feel a sense of loss from the type of closeness that existed before.
2. I don’t enjoy being around these same people anymore, because what brings
them happiness, no longer does so for me.
3. When I make changes that make me happier, I feel like I want to share that with others, and see them experience positive results–but they have no interest in doing anything different.

It’s some character flaw on my part that I need to ferret out.
I’d like to think that it’s not an overbloated ego/arrogance thing, but
I don’t know, but it is something that needs to be fixed.

At the very least, I need to be more accepting on how other people live their lives.

A problem on my end is that cultivation can be kind of a lonely experience.

Actually, let me qualify that last statement.
When I do qigong etc., I actually feel less lonely (in general) and feel happier and at peace internally. Ironically, any loneliness I feel occurs when I’M WITH OTHERS, for then I sense the greater separation due to the three things listed above.

Best,
Steve

It’s the nature of the human life, that’s all. If you are determined to say hello to something new you have to say goodbye to something old so as to make room. It is natural to be sad about it, it is not a bad thing. It is a love thing! And love hurts sometimes.

It is death and rebirth already in your practice, all a part of learning to grow. If you think about it, the inability to say goodbye to what isn’t working is all a part of what is the problem with these other people you are talking about, and perhaps with humanity in general.

You loved something, but now you find it is time for it to be over. Not to be sad or to ignore the sadness would be worrying. To be sad is actually encouraging, because it shows your commitment. It is a genuine emotion which you are not afraid to admit and face – you should be proud of that, because it shows exactly the kind of courage your friend admitted he didn’t have.

For myself, maybe I don’t need to say, but the clarity of mind and heart, the power to actually help others, the beauty and excitement of being alive and in tune with myself (as opposed to editing myself so as to fit in), not to mention the far cooler people I’ve found myself hanging out with, not to mention VERY good sex (hhheeeeeyow!) make it so worth it that there is not even any sadness left on that account. I look at the lives of those I left behind and am very glad I’m not living them!

Remind yourself that what you are doing is worthwhile and indeed perhaps more – perhaps essential. Don’t worry what they think about you or you about them! Sometimes later on people start to come around but it won’t be because of you preaching or anything; if they come to it they will do so on their own, because they are not open-minded yet enough to listen to themselves, never mind you!

The other thing is, of course a group gives support for one’s decisions. One will feel alone suddenly take a much bigger decision by oneself. But this is essential to any path – individual power springs from the ability to make a decision and stick with it, no matter what others say (or would say if you’d listen!). See things through, and if they make feelings, have the feelings and don’t worry!

I don’t see a character flaw in you on this account at all.

I hope this is helpful.

love NN

…but that you better not try to do anything about it. Doing things about things is a favorite manipulation game we play down here. We like to spend lots of time trying to fix things, trying to do things right, convince others of our rightness and get them to change, bemoan ourselves, suffer… Yada-yada.

I say- get in underneath it all and just be with yourself. Do what you want to do. Feel what you’re feeling. And use your feelings as your automatic pilot to tell you whether you’re on track or off.

And remember that loneliness and everything else is a self-created state that comes from our perception at the moment. And that states are relatively momentary but will be drunk up by the ego and indulged in as “problems” if we don’t keep a hold of ourselves moment by moment.

So don’t be the ferret, be the stalker. Stalk yourself. And smile while you do it so you don’t take your fucking self so seriously.

Speaking from fucking vast personal experience with this and smiling about it while I write-
Alexander

Character flaw, schmaracter flaw. Sorry, AA 🙂 Otherwise – AA has many words of wisdom.

Steve – it is a stage you are experiencing; no more no less. Many people have experienced exactly what you are so eloquently describing. If you continue along the path, things will align…Friends will go and new friends will join you. The feeling of separateness will dissipate once you realise it doesn’t truly exist.

Chin up, smile down, get your groove on 🙂

Blessings.

Peace out.
E

Hey Steven –

As you can tell, both of the subsequent contributors to this question mostly rephrased what I said:

ALEXANDER:
“Do what you want to do. Feel what you’re feeling. And use your feelings as your automatic pilot to tell you whether you’re on track or off.”

ME:
“See things through, and if they make feelings, have the feelings and don’t worry!”

ALEXANDER:
“We like to spend lots of time trying to fix things, trying to do things right, convince others of our rightness and get them to change, bemoan ourselves, suffer…”

ME:
“Sometimes later on people start to come around but it won’t be because of you preaching or anything; if they come to it they will do so on their own, because they are not open-minded yet enough to listen to themselves, never mind you!”

EMELGEE:
“If you continue along the path, things will align…Friends will go and new friends will join you”

ME:
“the beauty and excitement of being alive and in tune with myself (as opposed to editing myself so as to fit in), not to mention the far cooler people I’ve found myself hanging out with”

… so you mustn’t mind Alexander’s grouchiness; he is a little unkind and quixotic at the moment, constantly telling people they should be other than how they are, more advanced than they are, more like himself in fact, but he hasn’t noticed it yet. He insists he is ‘learning something’ from preaching at Intelligence just now, but all I see is tea all over the floor, that spilled when Alexander tried to pour it into a cup that was already full.

NN ;}

Hello Steven-

What I said to you I said in the spirit of the moment with the intent to reach you in another vein from Nnonnth’s based on the way I experience you through your writings.

Both he and Emelgee judged what I said and to tried to invalidate it because it tweaked them and they didn’t like it. For whatever reason, they tried to protect you from what they determined was an onslaught from me and in so doing may have neutralized some of the effect my words may have had on you. I hope what I wrote to you reached the inner mark I was aiming at anyway.

Nnonnth-

It is an insult to reduce everything I said to Steven to my “grouchiness.” I know exactly where I am coming from; it does not escape me. And I will be the judge of when and how much tea to pour in my communications. If you don’t like what I write don’t read it.

Alexander